No means Yes, I mean No...

The second man I had sex with, pothead Brian, I also met my freshman year, and I thought he was a potential soul mate. He fit the typical guy I am attracted to; brown hair, colored eyes, and a good smile. Things began slow in comparison to my first man. I asked him to be my date to our sororities grab a date party and we sucked our faces off on the dance floor. The older girls in the sorority reprimanded me for being “sluty” even though I am sure they were just jealous. Then the next time we got together, I thought he was in love with me or at least thought we would get into a relationship. This was also my first night of juggling two men. I had met a senior, Ryan, who was like Keanu Reeves with a drug addiction. I knew he abused prescription drugs, but still I said hey why not I’ll give him a try. So my dog faced girlfriend Ramona, druggie Ryan, and I were drinking in the dorms and I get a call from Brian who was seeing if I wanted to go on a ride with him and his friend. YES, of course I wanted Brian way more than the pill popping Keanu Reeves. So I left Ramona and Ryan to fend for themselves in hopes they would hook up, while Brian and I sat in the back seat of his friend’s car making out passionately not being able to keep our hands off one another. Not even caring we originally were going on a ride to get high. Anyways, we got back to my dorm where Ryan and Ramona were just talking and Ryan would not leave and Brian obviously wanted to spend the night with me. Looking back I should have either suggested a threesome or Ryan and I should have gone back to his dorm, but I am a good friend and couldn’t ditch Ramona. However, I was stuck awkwardly cuddling with Ryan and Ramona and Brian were in Door Handel’s bed. In the morning I learned Ramona had gave Brian head and was now in love with him herself. Bitch he’s mine I wanted to tell her, but I didn’t have the guts to be honest and tell her point blank she was sloppy seconds. So when she realized he liked me our friendship was done and of course I was the bad guy. And you may be wondering why I still had hope in getting with Brian and he didn’t do anything to reciprocate the favor. I don’t blame him if some guy started going down on me that I didn’t like, I wouldn’t stop him as long as he was talented.

So I truly think I am in love with this guy, and he asked me to go to his frat dance with him. Therefore, another night he asked me to come meet him at his friend’s house for a party. Soon after I got there we went into his friends room for I thought making out and maybe a hand job or a blowjob since I had my period. However as we were making out on the bed he took out my tampon. And I was like NO I do not want to be a slut and have sex with him because I was taught to hold off on sex to hold onto a man (true statement). For even though I kept saying no, he knew I wanted him and I did, so my no’s turned to yes and he slipped a condom on and gently entered me and I went with it. Then after we had sex I figured there was no point to hold out so we had gotten together on other occasions. But he never took me to that dance, he asked another girl from his dorm. So heartbroken I hoped to never make this mistake again falling for an asshole. But I don’t think I ever learned my lesson.

Don't Come Knockin' if the Bunk Beds are Rockin'

Since I was 5 years old, I knew what sex was even if I didn’t know how it exactly happened. But I did know it was an act between a man’s penis and a woman’s vagina. Also young and naive from watching all the Disney movies possible, I thought Prince Charming would sweep me off my feet marry me and fuck me gently. Boy I couldn’t have been more wrong. If you read my introduction, yes I am not lying I lost my virginity to a one night stand and it was so long ago now I can’t even remember his name.

Anyhow, let me take you back to this unforgettable night in 2003. My first semester at Miami University, no not in Florida, it’s in Oxford Ohio where the college of 16,000 doubles the town’s population. So you can imagine there is not much to do besides drink, do drugs, tip cows, or have sex.

My friend Melissa from high school also decided to attend Miami University, and we didn’t want to ruin our friendship, thus we decided to have random roommates. Luckily, we were put in the same dorm and her obese, albino roommate actually had a cute cousin, Jason that went to a near by university. So one Friday Jason and his friend were coming to party with Melissa and I in my room since my bi-polar roommate “door handle” frequently left to go back to her mommy and daddy’s place (nickname actually very similar to her real name). Anyways, all four of us were drinking and playing games, and in an hour or so the lights were dimmed and my unnamed virginity taker chose to play Kenney Chesney’s rendition of “I love to lay you down”, as he climbed to the top bunk and Melissa and Jason took the bunk below. Within a few minutes the bunk beds were rocking.

A pillow was placed over my face to muffle my screams as my cherry was popped. Thankfully it also helped muffle my laughter from the noise and movements from below. Both men finished rather quickly since both of our vaginas were un-penetrated and in no need of kegels.

Melissa and I both went to the restroom laughing and excited at our accomplishment and was pleased we were not extreme bleeders. When we returned back to the dorm room the men said they were going to leave and get food and return. We believed them, but of course, they never came back. However, Melissa and I were still excited knowing this would be a night we could never forget.

Introduction

Some may call me easy, a slut, skank, floozy, or a hoe…you get the idea. And it has taken me years of fighting the dominant beliefs and definitions of these words. For I have never been paid to have sex or perform sexual favors. Nor have I ever had to pay for them. All of the sex I’ve had has been with men whom I was attracted to (maybe with beer goggles) and who were attracted to me or at least my vagina. Because I have been a sexual being my entire life as all humans should be. The asexual people are the people to fear, not the men and women with normal libidos. I digress.

I lost my virginity at the age of eighteen to a man I met that night. A one night stand and like many girls I was taught your first time should be special and with your husband. However I was horny from the age of five when my cousin and I began playing doctor and I also lived a very sheltered life. So of course I rebelled the second I escaped home and went to college. Then after my cherry was popped, I felt guilty, but then slowly one man after another I added to my list of sexual partners. Some of my friends would judge and I would blame it on alcohol and say I would never do it again. And of course, I knew my parents would never support my sexual escapades since they met in high school and married a few years later. But I didn’t meet Mr. Right in high school, college, and now not even in graduate school. But as mentioned, I have met many booty calls, friends with benefits, and one night stands.

My list is well over thirty, I have lost count, and have not updated my list in a long time. Because finally I have successfully ignored the stereotypes of easy women and nymphomaniacs and I am happy with my life, I love it and myself. For I believe Mr. Right will come along eventually. I definitely do want to be in a serious relationship, but my mother always said you can’t look for love. I believe this, however you can look for sex and sexual partners, and for a horny woman like me, I welcome any man who is single, attractive, with no STD’s, and has a good sized penis…at least for a night. I was taught sex should be a beautiful act between two people who love each other. Now I have never experienced that. None of the men I have been with I have loved, some I liked a lot but none of them were even boyfriends. While yes if there is an emotional connection, obviously sex is better. But one can’t deny sex is a primitive physical act. All living things were created to reproduce one way or another. But popping out babies is not the only reason to have sex, otherwise the world would be more over populated than it already is. Thus, I guarantee the statistic of people having sex for pleasure is insanely higher than the people having sex to procreate. Therefore, me having sex when the opportunity arises doesn’t hurt anyone since I am single. The only possible person to get hurt is myself if a condom breaks or a condom is forgotten and I get pregnant or an STD. But that is why they created Plan B, because I would rather spend $50.00 to be safe than $1,000 to get an abortion on top of all of the emotional trauma that comes with it. I was raised Catholic, meaning Pro-Life all the way, so my mom always said if I got pregnant she would raise the child as her own. That kept my legs closed all through high school. I mean what sane person would have a baby that then would be raised like a sister. No thank you.

Therefore, I am writing this to give other horny women like myself strength and empowerment. It is your body and you have the right to do whatever you want, sleep with whoever you want, eat whatever you want, wear whatever you want as long as you are happy and are doing things because you want to. Not making choices because “that’s how it should be” or “that’s what the media says” or that was how I was raised”. It’s bull shit, because I am sure you will all agree with me, it takes a lot more for a man to be labeled a man whore than a woman to be called a slut. We are equal despite we still live in a white dominated patriarchal society where women are still paid only seventy cents to a dollar compared to a man. Even though the visible inequality may never change between women and men in our lifetime, women have to choose to break the norms, stereotypes, and labels ourselves.

For I do not believe women were put on earth to serve men, make babies, and cook. Fuck that housewife shit. I am going to make something of myself.

Disclaimer: I appreciate all housewives and stay at home moms. My mom is an amazing example of one, love you mom!